Oct 5, 2020
Veronica Cisneros joins the show to talk about how therapists can start empowering their personal and professional lives. Most likely, you lack vulnerability. Veronica says it’s time you started taking care of yourself and engage in the hobbies that spark your joy and fire your passions. Think about the life that you want to live in. How are you currently pursuing it? Well, it’s time to start permitting yourself to do the things that you want to do. Plus, don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Stay tuned as Veronica reveals her habits for success.
Veronica is a licensed marriage and family therapist, motivational speaker, mother of three, and wife of her beloved husband of 20 years. Through personal experience, she has defeated life’s challenges by leaning into fear unapologetically. She’s taught hundreds of women how to take ownership of their lives, lean into fear, and let go of judgment. However, this is not a big enough impact and she learned to empower the millions of women worldwide who suffer. She focuses on creating true change, encouraging women to no longer compromise themselves in order to meet the needs of others.
A lot of therapists’ lack of vulnerability - Veronica sees this frequently. There’s a fear of being exposed. If a therapist exposes their true self, then what are other people going to think? If someone knew their reality, then what would people say? Veronica says that therapists are wrapped up in their identity as a therapist. When you take away your therapist role, then who are you? When is the last time you engaged in one of your hobbies? It’s time that therapists start thinking about themselves and give themselves permission to be real humans and show their vulnerabilities.
Veronica thought about the life she wanted to live. She wants to be a connected and exceptional mom and wife. Then, Veronica thought about what was standing in her way. She looked at herself and examined what she was doing. Eventually, Veronica realized that she didn’t think she was deserving. Her house was at a higher ranking than herself. She looked at her life and how she wanted to change it. Instead of thinking she wasn’t worth it, she decided to create her perfect day. For instance, when Veronica sleeps in, she gives herself grace. She permits herself to do the things that she wants to do.
Veronica used to wake up to a checklist and would yell at her kids because they were late for school. She found herself irritated the moment she woke up. Veronica realized it was her fault – she needed to ask her husband for help. What boundaries have you set, and how have you asserted yourself? Veronica never asked her husband for help. Instead, she felt resentful. Plus, she felt guilt and shame for screaming first thing in the morning. Veronica knew something needed to change. She could have blamed her kids and her husband. Instead, Veronica decided to take action. She asked for help and let go of perfection.
Veronica says vulnerability is her habit for success. She can live unapologetically by being vulnerable. That means she is going to be subjected to criticism. If someone walks into your house with dirty dishes in the sink, there might be some form of judgment. Well, do it anyway. Permit yourself to be your true authentic self. That way, you are no longer attempting to meet other people’s needs. Make sure you have fewer expectations – it’s time to accept your family for who they are and who they are not.
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Gordon is the person behind The Practice of Therapy Podcast & Blog. He is also President and Founder of Kingsport Counseling Associates, PLLC. He is a therapist, consultant, business mentor, trainer, and writer. PLEASE Subscribe to The Practice of Therapy Podcast wherever you listen to it. Follow us on Twitter @therapistlearn, and Pinterest, “Like” us on Facebook.